NaNoWriMo – Day 5 aka Fuck Farm!

I have done three things since yesterday that I said I would NEVER do:

1.  I used the word ‘quivering’ when describing thighs.

2. I used the word ‘throbbing’ when describing… well you can guess.

3. I have decided to put a half naked man on the cover of Sin for Love.  I found him, asked him to model for the cover, and he agreed.

And ya know what?  I’m super ok with all of that!  What I’ve learned over the last five days of being in NaNoLand is that there are not really any rules and the ones that do try to exist… well you can tell them to fuck off!  And if they still come at you spouting their ridiculous restrictions you can tell them to take their Mangina Slurping Asses to the Fuck Farm!  Yea, that will send them running.

I also learned that characters can be dicks and will run wild naked in a field while throwing ears of corn at you yelling “you can’t catch me” at times.  For example, today I found out that Reese, my main male character, can be a not so nice person… someone broke into his shop, trashed it, and stole his baseball that had been signed by the entire team.  They tracked the guy down and Reese used his kneecaps for batting practice…. WTF? that wasn’t in my outline at all!

A good friend of mine gave me much needed validation and hit the nail on the head when he tweeted “I have to say, if nothing else #NaNoWriMo is the perfect vehicle for new authors to find there voice! @AuthorClaudiaB is a perfect example!” ~@wordrew

My new word count total is 25,001 – I’m half way there Bitches!!!  And I could not have done this if I didn’t let go and finally find my FUCKING VOICE!!!

I have also experienced my first victim of NaNo… my hair.  I think I may have forgotten to shower, I think I did on Sunday *smells pits*  but can’t be sure at this point.

Proof of the violence…

IMG_3169

Today’s snippet is brought to you by a drug laden Tessa, enjoy!

“Ok baby I’m going to stay on the phone with you until you are safe inside.  Tell me about the rest of your flight.”

“I did my own seatbelt!” she said again.

“I know baby I’m so proud of you.  What else did you do?”

“I think I broke the potty.” she sighed.

“You broke the potty?” I asked.

“Yes, I mean I think I did.  I had to pee and so I went in there and locked the door behind me.  When I was done peeing I flushed and it was loud Reese.  It was so loud that I thought it was broken and I was going to be sucked out of the plane.  I didn’t want to get sucked out of the plane so I tried to open the door but it wouldn’t open!  I thought the plane was trying to kill me Reese, I’ve seen snakes on a plane you know!  Well when the door wouldn’t open I started banging on it yelling about getting sucked out with my pee.  That’s when the nice lady opened the door.  She checked the potty and told me it was ok, helped me back to my seat and gave me the valium.  But I still think I broke it.”  I could hear the cabbie’s full belly laugh as he was certainly listening to Tessa charming story.

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2 Responses to NaNoWriMo – Day 5 aka Fuck Farm!

  1. I can’t believe I am just now finding your blog! Love this excerpt – and seeing your list of broken rules!! Who is this half-naked man? Is he your muse???

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